Paralysed By Cosmological Issues
At the moment I'm distanced enough from reality to be able to write something down about all of this junk. Maybe it's because my stomach's full of a roast beef sandwich that's taken all the blood away from my brain. However, I still remember the thoughts, so I can recount them even though I'm not currently experiencing them.
Found myself standing in the middle of my room at about 2am. Completely paralysed. Not sure how long it lasted. Quite a while. The true meaning of any potential action completely eluded me. So why should I even move? Even something like the idea of writing down my thoughts seemed purely pointless and meaningless. A mere distraction. Action was far less important than thought. But where should I direct my thought? Why should I direct my thought? I don't know - but I can't stop thinking, so surely I'm supposed to direct it somewhere. What is the goal of sending my thoughts one way or the other? How can I reach a conclusion? It has to be a satisfying conclusion that allows me to live. Faking my way out of this state seems wrong; maybe even morally wrong - a denial of the truth. Somehow I eventually managed to move. I sat on my bed. I read some more. Sometimes, all of this is so powerful that even the act of reading in search of answers seems like a distraction from reality, masquerading as something true and worthwhile. Presently my great fear is that I will not find the true way out of this state. This fear is exacerbated by the fact that the world doesn't care whether or not people find the true way out. The world is more concerned with being comfortable. And a world that is concerned with being comfortable wants other people to be comfortable with it. Not necessarily 'comfort rather than truth', which implies the two are mutually exclusive, but perhaps 'comfort via a truth-bypass: the simplest way is good enough'. But it is not good enough.
I don't know. I am freaking confused.
posted by J @ 10/30/2005 10:39:00 PM
3 Comments:
The world may not care if you find the true way out. But Someone much bigger and better cares. Don't give up - the way is open...
The world is so willing to just accept a simple solution.
So willing to go with the solution they have that will do the job without thinking wether there is a better one.
We cant stop that. At least not completly. We can try, we can work in individual cases to encourage people we see accepting a less perfect solution to look at better ones, but the only place we have real control is in our own lives.
We need to be willing to think, to constantly re-examine our own opinions. Constantly re-evaluating what we are doing. Note the active word here. Im not advocating sitting back and doing nothing while we aim for perfection. Im simply sayhing take the best option avalible to you, but while doing so, look for better ones.
Don't let our inate apathy force us into minimalism.
I don't know if theat helps at all...
But your right. Just taking the simplest solution is not good enough. And never should be.
Hey I was thinking, if you want others opinions or what they have worked out and stuff you could work out what you are looking for on a particular thread of thinking and ask a specific question.
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